Hey first post for some time, there is stuff on the desk waiting to go on but first heres a new Heavy Metal podcast for you all. Featuring an exclusive Motorhead Overkill track with the new line up plus new songs from the deftones, soilwork, overkill, some old skool classics and much more I hope you enjoy and if you dont then go fuck yourself! Listen to or download by clicking here
After seeing the remake last night I came away with mixed thoughts. I thought the new movie was pretty kick ass and had a lot more depth then the original in terms of explaining how Zeus ended up banging Perseus's mum and on mans rise against the gods. However I was walking into the cinema with the mindset that this is gunna be a big blockbuster movie about greek mythology and nothing to do with the original masterpiece.
The set was pretty cool but was a bit strange in the fact that only four figures were made as if Mattel were somewhat reluctant in putting to much attention for a figure line for a blockbuster summer movie.
The main man Perseus has a good likeness and comes with a standard sword and shield that the rest have. Mattel forgot to put the accessories in with this one I think because the shield and the helmet are not here.
The winged horse Pegasus came boxed with a Perseus action figure and was a pretty cool model. End of the day it was a horse with wings that didn't move so that's all i can say on that really.
Calibos looks a bit shit to be honest looks like it was made in 10 minutes with no attention to detail. However though kids at the time didnt give a fuck because no action figures back then looked like any one they were supposed to. If you look at the Star Wars toys from back then Luke Skywalker had yellow hair and a yellow stick to follow.
Charon the ferryman was a badass action figure. I used to use mine as a grim reaper who would keep nicking my dead Gi Joes. Its wierd that they made this figure when the character isnt in the film for longer than 3 minutes I swear. Whats even more stranger is that Medusa was never made instead or a badass Mount Olympus playset with the gods or something as well.
Thallo the soldier was made instead of Princess Andromida because Mattel thought boys wouldn't want a girl action figure with a Kraken play set over a standard action figure. Well I've got news for Mattel YOU FUCKED UP!
Mattel did make the Kraken and he is so bad ass just look at him! However with no Princess for him to kill/rape of whatever and no Medusa's head to beat him......... whats the fucking point! Mattel proper fucked up on this franchise big time! With only one titan, four figures (two of which side characters) and Pegasus this is somewhat of a disaster when you look at it.
Seeing this pisses me off even more when you see the potential this line could have had! In this post I have slagged the shit out of Mattel but its because I like this shit and I wish they would have made more of it instead of a few figures and one monster. You can pick this shit up on ebay for ridiculous amounts now days!
| 1. Ghost (Ian Astbury) |
| 2. Crucify The Dead (Ozzy Osbourne) |
| 3. Beautiful Dangerous (Fergie) |
| 4. Back From Cali (Myles Kennedy) |
| 5. Promise (Chris Cornell) |
| 6. By The Sword (Andrew Stockdale) |
| 7. Gotten (Adam Levine) |
| 8. Doctor Alibi (Lemmy Kilmeister) |
| 9. Watch This (Dave Grohl/Duff McKagan) |
| 10. I Hold On (Kid Rock) |
| 11. Nothing To Say (M Shadows) |
| 12. Starlight (Myles Kennedy) |
| 13. Saint Is A Sinner Too (Rocco DeLuca) |
| 14. We're All Gonna Die (Iggy Pop) |
According to South Park the Simpsons have made an episode about basically everything. Well remember that time when Maggie was kidnapped by a pedophile ring and the family had to beat up everyone involved?.... Well no they didnt make such an episode but they made a beat em up arcade game in 1991 which has a pretty similar plot!
While I'm on the subject doesent Maggie rhyme with Maddie? hell maybe the Mccans should take a leaf out of the Simpsons book and start whooping some ass instead of bitching in the papers! Anyways the plot of the game is Smithers (yes man of Mr. Burns the power-plant owner and Homers boss) has stolen Maggie because she caught hold of a diamond during a failed jewel heist. Ok he must be a nonce because why not just take the diamond off the baby and then leave her in a bin or something? why kidnap her as well? So there's our plot now Homer, Marge, Lisa and Bart must take to the streets of Springfield and beat their way to their child.
The game was developed by Konami (who made crime fighters in my last review) and is a four player which only uses two buttons for each player. This game is best enjoyed with four players as it does get a tad harder when more enemies are on the screen and it looks better having the whole Simpsons family battling it out.
The game has a few different levels to go through same amount as any arcade beat em up really. These include Krustys theme park, Moe's tavern, downtown Springfield, a grave yard, the woods, a dream world and finally Springfield power plant for the boss stage.
Most of the enemies in the game look like pedophiles wearing pink shirts and suits so its really fun to bash there heads in. Other enemies and bosses include a giant bowling ball, a giant Krusty balloon, a wrestler, a bear, a suicide bombing Smithers (who has a flasher jacket full of explosives) and finally Mr Burns in some giant robot suit.
The games visuals are pretty good for its time and there is quite a lot of voice recorded content in the sound effects which was always a plus for any game back then. Playing this game as a kid was always a thrill and yet you did get value for your credits but completing the game without at least paying a tenners worth of pound coins would be a nightmare of a challenge.
This game is the best Simpsons game ever made but when you look at the franchise's games on a whole that doesn't say much as every other Simpsons game released sucked! From Barts nightmare to the Simpsons wrestling this one is the only one worth playing.
Crime fighters is a side scrolling beat em up from 1989 made by Konami. Using the same formula as Double Dragon and Streets of Rage, Crime Fighters was a welcome addition to the genre with its ultra violent moves and colorful characters. The story of the game is some mother fucker has kidnapped loads of bitches so you have to get the train into town and kick every ones head in! With all sorts of melee weapons available, the ability to kick peoples heads in as they lay on the floor and also kick them in the nuts till they writhe on the floor in agony really made you feel your £1 was well spent. However the game is so fucking hard on one player that a pound didn't get you very far in some arcades which then with no credits left you felt the urge to start kicking people in the nuts for real to make your self feel better after being duped by greedy arcade owners from the 1990s.
Overall this game was a blast to play on coin ops when I was a kid and it kept me happy many days during summer holidays abroad in the hotel arcades. Almost every time a found this game it was always twinned with Mortal Kombat 1 on a 2 on 1 cabinet. You can download this game on emulator online it should be under the mame system. The engine for this game was revived for Konamis excellent Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle beat em ups for coin op and consoles a few years later. Check back in the next few weeks and there may be more updates when I think of anything else I feel like sharing with the world. CLICK THE VIDEO BELOW TO WATCH THIS GAME IN ACTION
Madballs were a series of collectible toys released in the late 1980s by Amtoy (who also created the Amazing My pet monster teddy bears) who was bought out some time ago by Tyco. If you like disgusting amputated heads and playing catch loads then this was the product for you. If I remember correctly there was only about 8 in the series consisting of an eyeball, a mummies head, a skull, a cyclops, some weirdo with his eye hanging out and a Frankenstein's monster head. Growing up in the 80's was awesome and products like this made it that little bit more...well awesome. I remember taking one to school and my hippy "lets all go to San Fransisco and smoke crack through Jerry Garcia skull and hug everyone" primary school teacher freaked out when i stuck the eyeball one inside her acoustic guitar and my mother was called in.
Later on the series really kicked off and a madball styled American football, soccer ball and basketball were released along with a series of action figures who had madballs for heads. These figures had a switch on their back and when pressed the heads would shoot off as if being fired out of a gun! Honestly i think i got my first black eye off of one of them figures...actually I think my first one was when I was six and my teenage sister who listened to new kids on the block through a stiletto across the room which hit me heel first in the eye! I did get a Hasbro Macho Man Randy Savage figure from her in order to silence me but that went out of the window when the arm fell off and replacement wasn't bought!
Madballs had a cartoon series released in 87 and along with a line of greeting cards, comic books, video games and bedsheets the franchise proved quite popular but didnt survive to the 1990's (apart from the UK where everything would resurface from time to time) and was discontinued. There was a madball revival I did hear a few years ago but I havent seen any to comment. Original Madballs can be picked up on ebay in all sorts of conditions from carded mint in boxes to used. These range from 99p to £40 but if i were you i wouldnt pay £40 as these are not rare sought after items
Nightmare on Elm Street gets a platinum dunes make over! Jackie Earl Harley from the watchmen gets to don the razor fingers, striped sweater and burned skin in what seems to be a much darker take on the 1984 classic. From what I can gather so far the production looks promising. Being a huge fan of the original series I was totally against a remake of this but as the times gone on and more has been revealed, I'm looking forward to it and think it will be much better than last years Friday the 13th remake (which felt like a sequel if anything) and be on par with Rob Zombie's Halloween remake.
Clash of the Titans gets the CGI treatment this March with a remake of the 1981 classic. Since then visual effects and state of the art film making has come a long way in the last 29 years from Ray Harryhausen's stop motion wizardry. The original is an all time favorite of mine and yes this does look epic.
Remake of the 1941 Universal Monster classic starring Lon Chaney Jr, the Wolfman hits the big screens this summer with Benicio Del Torro playing the lycanthrope. Anthony Hopkins co stars as well as Hugo Weaving. With this being the first of the Universal monster remakes I'm hoping that a Dracula and Frankenstein make over are on the cards to
Iron Man 2 looks immense! The sequel to the 2008 smash hit movie arrives in May when Tony Stark and friends make a welcome return to the silver screen. Samuel L Jackson makes his presence felt taking the role of Nick Fury of SHIELD (I'm sure he will do a much better job then Hasslehoff did in the 90s!) with Robert downey reprising the role of Tony Stark. With Marvel comics being acquired by Walt Disney last year who knows what the future holds for the Marvel comics and this movie franchise!
The A-Team has been announced for a 2010 release but not much information has been released on the project as of yet. However I can confirm that the cast is as follows
The Karate Kid remake looks utter pants! The Karate Kid looks like snoop doggs unwanted stepson (who is actually Will Smiths actual son!) the baddies have nothing on the Cobra Khai and Jackie Chan is an awful and obvious pick for the Mr Miagi role. By the looks of things Jaden smith has inherited his fathers ability to kill a blockbuster! Lets face it Ali, Independance day and I am legend would have all been much better pictures if the prince of fresh air wasnt in them! I really hope this does terrible at the box office! I almost have as much contempt for this project as I do for Rocky V and i fucking hate that movie! Mind you in all fairness I thought the original Karate kid was a pussyhole! Anyone who goes to their high school prom dressed as a shower curtain deserves a can of whoop ass! I wanna make the directors cut where Daniel gets chopped to death and Mr Miagi just laughs because he never knew Karate and it was all just a cruel joke by an old man who works in a silly tree shop!
The ultimate action movie directed by and starring Sylvester Stallone the Expendables hits our screens this year also. A solid cast featuring Steve Austin, Randy Couture, Mickey Rouke, Jason Statham to name a few has some hype to live up to. Based on the trailer though the jury is stillout as far as I'm concerned.
